Maternity impossible
by lastat-chan
Summary: Mpreg... mmyes run... Well let's say our favorite white hair genral and his friend Zack and candidate Cloud are gonna go through hell. Slight yaoi but only hinted in jokes. Poor Seph...
1. Diagnosis pregnant

**_Hey this is vamp! Yes my first video game mpreg… With my favorite white haired homicidal maniac, human chocobo, and completely insane black haired person. Yeah Sephiroth is good and Zack is alive. Well wish me luck and poor Sephiroth… Well yeah you can guess. Well this is vamp out!

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Sephiroth lay in the infirmary; his bluish green eyes scanned the room. The florescent light cast a shine on his shiny silver hair and his pale skin glowed against the black leather outfit he wore. He turned on his side and started to fall asleep, it was a big fiasco for him today he swore he was going to castrate Hojo with a rusty spoon and disembowel him with a Tibbytubby doll.

"Hey sup Sephy!" beamed Zack as he walked in and looked at his pale friend.

"…What do you think?" asked Sephiroth in a very slow threatening voice.

"Aww! Come on cheer up Cloud's here and we wanna make sure our favorite general feels better!"

"Shut up…" said Sephiroth as he rolled over away from Zack.

"H… Hello General Sephiroth sir!" said Cloud saluting as he walked up next to Zack.

"Hey Cloud don't be formal Seph is off duty for now… And for a while," chuckled Zack.

"Uhm… Alright what's goin on? Why is he gonna be out for a while?" asked cloud.

"Well he and Hojo…"

"Zack! If you so much as utter one more syllable I will cut out your tongue!"

"'He and Hojo' what?"

"Well when a man loves a woman and they decide to…"

"I'm not a woman… And I will kill Hojo if it's the last thing I do!"

"Sephiroth got molested by Hojo?"

"Well violated more correctly."

Just as Sephiroth was going to get up to stab Zack with his masumane the doctor in all his smiling idiotic glory came walking in with a smile from ear to ear and his eyes open looking at Sephiroth.

"Well should I tell you the good news or the bad news?"

"Bad first… Good might give me a reason not to stab my stomach through."

"Ok bad news, you are pregnant! Well for women that's good news… Good news is it's your baby and some girl named Ifalna (sp?)," beamed the doctor, Sephiroth looked pissed.

"I'll kill him… I'LL KILL HIM!" shouted Sephiroth as he struggled to get off the bed as Zack and Cloud held the kicking and struggling Sephiroth down to make sure he didn't follow out with his plan to kill Hojo.

"You might want to bring him to his apartment; I think he needs to lie down for a while. Well Zack if you and Sephiroth need any medical advice during his… err… Pregnancy please don't be afraid to come ask."

Zack nodded and hurried Sephiroth out the door and he and Cloud managed to convince Sephiroth to go to bed somehow. Zack sighed he guessed Sephiroth is going to be like this for quite a while. Then he thought, how Sephiroth was supposed to do his job when a baby was growing inside the general, oh and the mood swings can't forget those mood swings. Cloud was horrified about the fact his hero was now going through a phase that was not ment for any man to experience.

"Hey Cloud… I know Seph is gonna kill me for this but… Would you like to live here with us and help us out? I'm sure he'd like it secretly, I mean you are his favorite cadet," smiled Zack. Cloud couldn't resist an offer like this in away but then he thought it was going to be awkward to be living with two men he hardly knew and looked up to, but Zack seemed nice enough and he and Seph would need all the help they can get; even if Sephiroth was to proud to admit it.

"Of course!" beamed Cloud.

"Awesome you can use my room, I mean I need to keep my eye on Sephiroth as much as possible," said Zack and Cloud scooted away from Zack very slowly with a nervous look on his face. "What? Is there something on my face?"

"Uh never mind. I'll go get my stuff you keep your 'eyes' on Sephiroth!" said Cloud putting a smile on his face.

"Ok then… Awkward," said Zack as closed the door and he approached Sephiroth's room, it was fairly simple, black sheets, white walls, gray carpet, a closet in the far left side of his room opposite from his bed where he slumbered. "Hey Seph, you feelin ok?"

"Mhh… What…?"

"We'll take care of you Cloud and I alright?" soothed Zack.

"…I'll be fine… Don't drag him into this… Mess…" murmured Sephiroth half asleep.

"Don't worry I'm not dragging anyone he volunteered, and you'll need all the help you can get so be happy you have people who care."

"Zack…"

"Go on back to sleep, I'll go cook," and to that reply Sephiroth sweat dropped, Zack and cooking utensils did not mix well, he thought about last time… Zack set clean tap water normal just tap water nothing in it on fire how he accomplished that he'll never know.

As Zack left the room Sephiroth rolled over he felt sick, and to top it all off he was tired and severely pissed off, he couldn't wait to wrench his fingers around Hojo's thin duck like throat and choke him to death.

"How's Sephiroth?" asked Cloud walking back in with a suit case.

"The usual, groggy, grumpy, old him," laughed Zack. Cloud set his clothes and uniforms down in Zack's room. Zack started to cook the smell of steam and spice started to make Sephiroth sleepier, and as he fell asleep the flashback of that day played in his head.

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**_Hey it's me again yeah I know it's either really gonna wind up funny or awkward… Or both, just one plea from me… Please don't maim me, stab me, or kill me in anyway this is for fun. Well till next chapter this is Vamp out peace!_**


	2. Morning sickness

_**Warning my cause loss of intelligence. Not really just a minor warning to please people who have suicidal brains… lol.**_

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Sephiroth walked into the lab, it had so far been a normal day for him men out training Rufus on Zack's ass about something he screwed up the usual. His blue green eyes scanned the room with a frown on his face; he knew Hojo was up to something he always was if he didn't answer the lab door. He saw Hojo bent over a table a scalpel in hand and something else a vial of some sort, Sephiroth couldn't make it out be he had the feeling to leave. He knew whatever that was it was ment for him… And there was no good to come of it either.

"Ah, Sephiroth so glad you're here you made it just in time."

"What do you want from me?"

"Lie down, I'll be with you in a moment," replied Hojo as he gestured Sephiroth to lie down, and Sephiroth complied. He heard Hojo mutter something about an operation and perfect specimen. "Sephiroth, this operation I'm about to perform on you will take a while, I'll need to put you to sleep."

Before Sephiroth could say "no" he had be injected with a medicine that made him fall into deep slumber and thus Hojo began. A few hours later he awoke, pain engulfed his abdomen and nausea struck him as well as dizziness and sweat dripped off his forehead, his face was pale and his eyes looked around quickly and he spotted Hojo cleaning out the vial he had full before the operation and a bloody scalpel as well.

"What… Did you do to me?" asked Sephiroth almost hesitate.

"Oh you will see in due time, I called Zack to escort you back to your apartment. I think you might need to take it easy for a while."

"You bastard what did you do!"

"Oh nothing much… Do you really wish to know?"

"Hey I'm here!" said Zack walking in to see Sephiroth glaring at Hojo and Hojo shrugging. "What's up?"

"Oh, I was about to explain why you need to help Sephiroth and keep him off his feet for a while," smiled Hojo and Sephiroth shifted in an uncomfortable manner. "I needed to complete this experiment one to save the cetra race and two to have a new scientific break through."

"And what does that have to do with me?" asked Sephiroth.

"I needed a strong surrogate to produce what I had fixed, we tried it on a grunt earlier but he died… And so did the baby so we used someone… Stronger."

"You… You didn't!" exclaimed Sephiroth.

"You made Sephiroth pregnant!" exclaimed Zack and Sephiroth nearly jumped up and sliced Hojo, but Zack held onto his shoulder.

"Well yes hypothetically speaking. Sephiroth is pregnant and will be a while but the baby was mature by a couple of months so he only has seven or six months with it before it's born as well."

"Why you!"

"Come on Seph there's no point of killing him if the deed's done, I'll bring you to the infirmary to make sure…"

**_End flash back dream…_**

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Sephiroth's eyes flickered open his blue green eyes scanned the room he heard Cloud and Zack discussing something, as he walked into the other room Zack waved and gestured him over.

"Hey sleepy head you're finally up!" said Zack.

"What're you two talking about?" asked Sephiroth as he held his head with his arm placed on the table.

"What we're supposed to do when the bulge in your stomach is noticeable enough for people to see."

"Oh… Shit… Well I guess I should wear loser outfits then."

"You should start wearing loser outfits now," said Cloud as Sephiroth looked down to see his outfit was sort of tight looking as it always had been maybe a little tighter and he knew that because now his pants were definitely uncomfortable and tight around his waist.

"Hmm… Maybe Aeris can help," suggested Zack.

"No! Not her anyone but her!" said Sephiroth as his face was covered by his hand.

"Who's Aeris?" asked Cloud.

"My old girlfriend now we're friends," explained Zack. "Seph I'm sure you need some feminine help during this and she's the only girl I know besides Scarlet."

"… Fine… Given the choices Aeris isn't that bad…"

"I knew you'd see things my way!" smiled Zack. "I'll go call her to come up today."

"Isn't it night?" asked Sephiroth.

"Nope, nine' o clock A.M you slept all afternoon last night and most of this morning," said Cloud.

"WHAT!"

"Calm down you'll be doing that a lot. You hungry Seph?" asked Zack just then Sephiroth stood up looking rather nauseous and walked to the couch and sat down.

"Morning sickness?"

"Morning sickness," said Zack as he saw Sephiroth run towards the bathroom and slam the door.

"I'll go get him one of my shirts and sweat pants, you call that girl ok?"

"Alright Cloud. I wonder if she'll help," wondered Zack.

**_Chapter 2 end…_**


End file.
